And if you look to your left..

.. you'll see my New Year's Resolutions. I felt I needed to post them "in public" for better motivation to meet my own goals. These are things that may seem somewhat silly and unimportant to others, but it means something to me. I'm not saying that being able to paint my fingernails defines the kind of person that I am, but I guess more than anything, I want to prove to myself that I can do it. Once you finish taking a gander at my goals, you may proceed to the second paragraph.

I know, I'm such a nerd. But anyway, in the next week, I plan to be ovulating, if my calculations are correct. ::woop woop:: I must say though, that my goal to "relax, and trust God more" is very much "in general." By that, I want to stress less, take fewer pregnancy tests, laugh more.. I don't know, tons of things that I feel like I can't do with anxiety tagging along.

As a living, I sell and service insurance policies. Daily, I talk about auto, homeowners, life, health, and other insurance policies. My spiel on life insurance includes the following: "The thing about life insurance (against others) is that it's not a matter of if you need to file a life insurance claim, it's when you do. Everyone will die from this earth one day.. that's certain." Well the other day, during a life insurance discussion with a coworker, I found myself literally freezing up at the thought of "Oh my God, I'm going to die one day! Oh my God, I'm going to die!" This probably sounds crazy but it has been weighing on my mind heavily ever since. I've been in the insurance industry for going on 4 years now, learning and talking about life insurance, and just the other day, I became so terrified of my own death. I didn't even get this shook up when I purchased my own life insurance policy. Why now? Anxiety, a reoccuring foe of mine.

So to Anxiety, I say:
Anxiety, I don't want to be "friends" anymore! You're not welcome in my life any longer. By the way, I hate your friends Worry and Depression that you always bring with you! One day, I plan on meeting real, good friends named Self-Worth, Happiness, and Peace, and I can't have you in the way and holding me back. I've spent way too long letting you make all the decisions and I'm done!

Whew.. now that I have that off of my chest, I'm going to spend the rest of the day with my husband.